You Are The Smell Before Rain

I am so tired. It may seem like I’m saying that a lot lately, but it’s true. My mind has been occupied by so many things, so many troubles and so many stresses.

It’s a wonder, sometimes, that I don’t fall apart with everything I try to hold inside.

I know I didn’t make a personal post or a fiction post last week; however, that was with good reason. Not only was I absolutely knackered, but I had a lot of things going on. One of which was completing a story for a project that you will all find out about soon enough.

I also had a night out with the lovely lady that I work with. It was her 60th birthday (so an extra happy birthday if she’s reading this). And here’s a picture of the awesome birthday cake she got:

Are you jealous? You should be jealous.

Anyway, I also got tagged in another Lucky 7 post by the brilliant @DavidALudwig. Unfortunately, I’d forgotten entirely about it over these past few weeks with everything. If you missed the first post then you’ll find it here. So, without further ado:

Now what is this meme, you ask? Well…

  • Go to page 7 or 77 in your current manuscript
  • Go to line 7
  • Copy down the next seven lines as they are – no cheating
  • Tag 7 other authors

So here’s seven lines from page seven of Breaking Cadence:

Alex moved to his car door, panicking with his keys, until Zander pushed past me.

“Go! Go! Go!”

The words were thrown angrily at the fumbling boy. Keys scooped out of Alex’s hands, Zander shoved him into the back of my baby and grabbed the girl too. All hair and spindly legs, she didn’t resist.

“Infected scum! Get away from my daughter!”

And now I get to tag seven lovely writers that I know. So here they are:

  1. @charitygirlblog
  2. @JWHankins
  3. @ladyaaron
  4. @Emilia_Quill
  5. @Leo_Godin
  6. @thefourpartland
  7. @scath

And a little poetry for you too:

Give Me Your Hand & I’ll Hold It

Feeling as if I’m dreaming despondent dreams
Of troubled thoughts that spill at broken seams.
These are darkened thoughts in grubby corners
That overflow on grubby borders.
Troubled tears on placid cheeks
Invisibly fall for burdened weeks.

Give me your hand and I’ll hold it.
Give you my heart and you’ve sold it.

Rain Song

Singing in the rain
Dancing in the rain
Hoping that the flurries
Take away the pain.

Hair tangled in the breeze.
Moonshine on the lane.
The shadows they’re all haunting me
But their faces are all the same.

Talk To Me

Did you know?
Did you know?
There’s no place left to go.
Did you feel it was so
Or did your heartache pull you low?

Did you know?
Did you know?
There’s no place left to go.
Is the presence of your foe
Why you dream you’re on death row?

Can you heal?
Can you heal?
Is it starting to feel real?
So you broke the seal
And now there’s nothing left to deal.

Can you heal?
Can you heal?
Is it starting to feel real?

Do you choke?
Do you choke?
On all the lovelorn smoke?

Is it done?
Is it done?
Did you finally fire the gun?
And do we run
Though we’re always blinded by the sun?

Can you hope?
Can you hope?
Or is it worth the rope?
Are you finding you can’t cope
And are you wanting to elope?

Digging Holes

What did you do? What did you do?
Why is this always about you?
Why can’t you sink below like a stone?
Why don’t you just call me right now on your phone?

Are you really this stupid? Of course you’re a mess.
Don’t know why I’m asking when I’ve heard you confess.
Was it really so hard to give me an answer?
Are you for real? Come on, be a man, sir!

I guess that I’m angry but not why you think.
You’re skating around on a very thin ice rink.
And when it snaps, you’ll be all alone;
Nobody to catch you or take you home.

I get told things, you know? & I worry a lot
About all that you do & what’s gone to pot.
You know what I want? It’s to give you a slap,
To show you the moments you’ll never get back.

Get off your blind horse, take a look at your route.
Stop pointing the gun at your foot & don’t shoot.
Because all of this mess
Is your fault so confess
You let it outside
You can’t let it slide

It’ll turn into an avalanche, bury you en masse
Trap you in a cavern surrounded by nothing but gas…

Reminisce

I remember kisses that fell like rain,
Between the ecstasy of diamond sips.
Those sensations I crave again
From that gentle touch to tender nips.
My fingers in the depths of your hair,
Twisting beneath the thickness of your curls,
And wondering if you know how much I care,
Even too afraid to say the words…
More emotional than physical, darling.
More sensational than this, my cold heart.
I remember the fear of saying your name
But the inability to do anything else.
The lack of thoughts of those once the same;
The inability to think of anyone else…
The first time that that has happened to me,
The first time no other name has almost slipped.
If only you weren’t too eager to see
The things that you had already witnessed.
I remember the dream that made me worry,
The one where you kissed me in the night,
The one that woke me in a hurry,
The one that made me think we might…
I remember the dream that you had too
And the look on your face when I spoke mine,
That day when I woke up with you,
Before, when we were friends and it was fine.
I remember the way I changed
Because I was finally ready to accept
The way my feelings ranged,
Still unspoken, still unchecked…
More emotional than physical, darling.
More sensational than this, my cold heart.
I remember when we first kissed
And how you tasted on my lips.
I remember how I’d wished
At the first feel of your fingertips.
And how I’d waited all the night,
Trying to make you jealous and hurt.
I wanted you to notice, alright?
To know that when I did flirt
With these other men in front of you
It was to get your attention,
To make you see who
Could be your competition,
Who could have me
If you didn’t…
I know that was stupid but
I wanted you a whole lot.
I wanted you to see it.
Not see that I was hot.
Far from it, I
Wanted you to ask me
If then, maybe I
Would be
Yours…

The physical was not just physical
To me.
It was a vessel of the emotional
You see…?
Do you…
See?

A Little Something

I crushed you and you crushed me
Is this the way it has to be?

*Title lyrics are from The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot by Brand New

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