& so we have our #SatSunTails winner!
You can help by promoting next week’s #SatSunTails on your blogs, twitter, G+, facebook, tumblr etc, that would be great. Also, if you’re on twitter and you’d like an @reply every weekend in order to remind you that the competition is open then please sign leave a note regarding this along with your twitter handle in the comments of this post so I can set that up for you.
But for now, let’s get to the winners!
Runner Up Mentions
Touching and heartfelt, this story really brought us into the mother’s plight and twisted when we least expected it.
This was certainly beautiful and certainly different from the other entries. Calm and emotional poetry that again touched the heart.
An intriguing take on the prompts, it felt like there was a bigger story that the reader could only guess at, providing an amount of mystery surrounding the narrator’s circumstances in this be careful what you wish for plot.
This story pulled you in from the word go and even made me flinch at one point. I think no further explanation is needed as to why this piece won. Instead, I suggest you read and enjoy.
Claire crashed through the trees, trying to find her way out of the forest. Everywhere she turned, tall oaks blocked her path. Behind her she could hear branches snapping. Scott’s wife was close behind. Gasping, Claire leaped back into the dense forestry. Marie’s words echoing in her head. “Run Bitch.”
Marie chuckled. The whore was leaving a clear trail. It had rained and Claire had left several prints in the mud. She had to give the woman credit, she was making good time without shoes.
Claire didn’t even see the hole, until she stepped in it, twisting her ankle and snapping one of the bones. She could see the light, just through the trees and hear the cars passing on the highway. Dragging herself forward, hope surged as she neared the edge of the forest. Strong hands on her ankle pulled her backwards. Screaming, she turned to fight.
“Shhhh,” Marie said, bringing the axe down.
Now, as promised, I shall critique those entries that didn’t make it.
There were (again) a few places where an “it’s” should have been an “its” (easy way to sort that is to read it as it is supposed to be with an i for ‘it is’ where the apostrophe should be. For example, ‘it licked it’s scales’. Clearly that should be “its”, as in belonging to it, because if we read it with the ‘i’ back in we get ‘it licked it is scales’, which obviously doesn’t make much sense) and where an ‘of’ should have been an ‘off’. These crack the tension when readers stumble over them; otherwise, this could have been a fantastic chilling tale.
I loved the idea behind this story, but it seemed there was a little too much telling and not enough showing. It’s tempting to tell our readers everything in the fear that they may not understand what we’re getting at, but we need to give readers more credit. Drop hints instead of letting them know everything. It makes it more exciting and involves them more with the text. Not everything needs to be on show.
As much as I enjoyed this piece, I felt that (in a couple of places) it could have done with reading aloud in order to improve the flow of words a little more.
So thank you to all of those who entered. The criticism is never meant to harm. It is there to help you better your writing and someday win overall. I’m sure it will also benefit those who were not criticised. I hope this has helped you as well as encouraged you to join in again next week!
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