“Are You Sure I Can’t Help You With The Anxiety?”

This is what the lady on the phone asked me last night when trying to direct me to the right service because my tooth has broken and I was crying and twisting my hands into knots because that’s what I do when I panic. The tooth is still broken, by the way, but I’ll get to that in a minute.

Dentists scare me.

I’m not really good at the whole being touched by anybody (physically) thing and somebody poking around in my mouth while I force myself to lie prone on a chair that’s tipped back, feeling every vibration and scrape as they probe my teeth and gums whilst leaning over me and therefore blocking my escape… Well, that just absolutely terrifies me in the most irrational way possible.

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Love Letters

I put my heart in a letter the other night. This letter will probably never see its recipient. It was never meant to be posted anyway – it was just a way to help me get to sleep and stop thinking things out.

A very good friend of mine, one of the best, once told me about how writing letters to people (even if you don’t send them) can help you to deal with things. Maybe it’s because you get out the things you want to say but can’t since you don’t have to worry about what the other person will think and how they’ll react.

Some of us are trapped by thoughts of others (hence my Rabbit Hearted Girl post).

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3, 2, 1 & You’re Back In The Room

Technically, this is my second week back at work but, as the first week started on a Wednesday, I’m still counting it as my first week back. And what a tiring first week back it’s been. I forgot just what an exhausting job it is.

I know it’s not for long in the morning and the evening, but you cram an awful lot of exercise into that time and you have to concentrate really hard while you’re doing it (plus there’s my 40 min walk to and from work twice a day). There are also a lot more kids and parents now. Or so it seems. And a lot of the kids have switched from the infant schools to the juniors, or the juniors to the secondary or have left the secondary. Some of them have just started the infants too or they’re going to nursery with their parents.

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