Run Down But Lucky

Maybe biting off a little more than I can chew whilst still ill and then stressing out about other things is what I’ve done. My mum said to me the other day I was doing too much and that was why I was so tired and kept getting the same cold back.

Beginning to think she might be right.

Mostly because I got two migraines in a row this week. I’m sure I’ve told you about how devastating and painful my migraines are, before, but I’ll do a quick recap for any new readers.

It’s not like a headache. If only. Headaches I can deal with. A migraine is like somebody has carved out part of your brain and keeps slamming that fresh, wet pith with a potato masher so it crushes the soft raw matter and reverberates all the way through the rest of your brain and down your neck and then through your spine; so it drags that disgusting, vibrating feeling into your stomach and that makes you as nauseous as hell.

But that’s discounting the symptoms of a migraine that I get before the pain even starts laying into me.

My migraines involve a sudden blind spot appearing. The point at which I’d normally focus is just gone. Not only that but I get a loss of feeling down one side (the opposite side of my body to the side of the head that I end up feeling pain on). I was told by doctors that it’s apparently my brain telling my muscles to relax. So of course, I have no coordination and just cannot look after myself properly under such circumstances.

This non-feeling eventually works its way around my limbs and into my mouth, where it numbs my gums, teeth, tongue and lips – which is, of course, another reason why I panic so very much when I go to the dentist and they numb the inside of my mouth. So my mouth cannot function to talk properly, not that it matters because by this stage my brain isn’t quite processing right so anything I am saying might not be quite what I mean it to be.

An example of this would be very late Sunday night (as the first migraine started to lay into me) when I said ‘writing’ and I was genuinely trying to convey something about my speech with no ideas or thoughts of writing in my head. I was also stuttering and stumbling over words as well as shivering, but I wasn’t overly aware of that.

Unfortunately, my partner was. And it was the first time he’d had to bear witness to these events. He spent most of that night awake fetching me cold flannels to cool my forehead when I woke in between deep sleeps. Apparently I also breathe rather worryingly and erratically during migraine sleeps – something I had no idea about. He also took that day off so he could look after me.

I had another one the night before last, though, so we had to run through the same horrible routine again. Thankfully, neither migraine hit me with the usual vomiting sessions so that’s better, but I still feel a bit out of sorts and disorientated.

I am lucky, though, because even through all this nastiness, I had somebody who loves me and cares enough to look after me when I’m at my worst.

All of this has subtracted my editing/writing/plotting time, though. As awful as this is, I don’t feel I can go any faster on it at the minute until I’m feeling wholly better, for which I apologise profusely.

I also apologise for any typos etc in this post. Hoping you’re all well anyway!

Also, don’t forget to check out my Paranormal Wednesday interview & my interview about Desecrated Bonds with the amazing J W Hankins!

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4 thoughts on “Run Down But Lucky”

  1. This was my first time visiting your blog, Rebecca. I clicked on a link to it from Twitter. I don't have migraines (but, goodness I never knew they caused so much misery – I'm so sorry!) I can relate, however, to many symptoms of having one. Loss of coordination, speech impediments, body temp changes, and "crashing" for a while in a deep noisy sleep. I wonder if those symptoms are generally associated with stress? Most likely so, I'm thinking. I've had a cold now off and on for two weeks, but the symptoms have varied – finally a few days ago I was at a breaking point because of juggling life, family, and writing….then the holidays. I decided to limit internet to an hour a day, turn OFF my phone and use home phone for any school emergencies for kiddo…I've even set up an off the grid FB account to admin my author page and have no friends. Lol. I deactivated my main account until my book release. Blogging will be put on hold while I time out to take care of myself while dealing with duties here at home – then even here, I try and use all the help I can for these next couple of weeks. The second day of being disconnected, hydrating with water, and taking passion flower herbal drops and all-natural herbal stress meds – I'm over my cold. But, I'm sticking to the two week disconnect, then starting the year new with better focus.
    I hope you get time to take care of yourself. It is a strong possibility your Mom is right! I'm glad you have someone to keep an eye and take care of you when you're at your worst. I'm thankful for my husband in this aspect too, at the moment. Please take care, and the writing, blog, and internet will always be here – Take Care Of YOU! 🙂 XoXo

    Laurie Kozlowski

  2. So sorry to hear of your migraines. I used to get them as a small child, but fortunately I grew out of them. I've never experienced the scary types of things you've described above though. All I can remember of the migraines I had was the intense pain, and sensitivity to any sound or light. I would have to be in a quiet, dark room with a cool wash cloth on my forehead. But I don't blame you for wanting to take it easy on yourself for the next few days. If you can't take care of yourself, how are you going to take care of others? Positive blessings your way!

  3. Thanks & I'm glad you started feeling better after your de-stress. I've taken some time (when not working) over these holidays and whilst I feel better, I'm still quite drained. Hopefully I'll get over that some time soon =)

  4. Thanks, dear! Yeah, my migraines aren't particularly normal. My mum gets them badly, but I seem to have hit the jackpot on them and not in a good way. I haven't had one in the last couple of weeks and chances are they'll stay away for about a year now. That's the usual grace period they give me, but I'm hoping for longer 😉

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